補習-Go easy on me this year, Santa

編者按：圣誕及新年的腳步越來越近，每個人都沉浸(immerse)在歡快的氣氛之中。在這其樂融融的畫面背后，卻有許多人顯得憂心忡忡——手中拿著冗長的購物清單，馬不停蹄地參加各種派對，還要為愛人準備別致的驚喜，這些都讓人頭疼不已，大家不禁要感嘆這個節日并不輕松。 人們期望著，寒假里的那些派對和禮物能夠為生活增添歡樂。但隨著圣誕及新年的臨近，一些學生正意識到，這些節假日只會給自己帶來難題。不論你相信與否，那些繁忙的日程表，應邀出席派對清單以及一堆急需購買的禮物，所有的這些使得這個節日假期樂趣全無。并且，有些人反映，節日里他們與朋友間的友誼也如履薄冰。 All those parties and gifts that come with the holiday season are supposed to fill our lives with joy. But as the Christmas and New Year's season grows near, some students are thinking that the holidays will only bring problems. Believe it or not, those busy schedules, a list of parties to attend, and gifts to buy are taking all the fun out of the season – and, according to some, putting friendships at risk. 華中師范大學二年級學生，18歲的杜敬琳就正為買送禮物而發愁。 Du Jinglin, an 18-year-old sophomore at Central China Normal University, is bothered by all the gifts she has to buy and distribute. “在節日期間，一個不落地派送朋友禮物，這真的是一個負擔，”杜敬琳說。“在此期間，更多人傾向于展示社交能力的舞臺，而不再是分享真情。” It's such a burden to cover all of my friends during the holiday season, said Du. [This period] has become more about showcasing one's social skills than about sharing love. 杜敬琳表示，去年他忘了送一位室友禮物。此后，她們間就有著說不出的尷尬。 Last year, Du says she forgot to buy a gift for one of her roommates and ever since there has been an unspoken awkwardness between them. 深圳某咨詢中心的心理專家齊崢表示，像杜敬琳這樣的經歷顯示出年輕人已經誤解了贈送禮物的初衷。 Qi Zheng, a psychologist at a Shenzhen-based consulting center, says stories like Du's show that young people have come to misunderstand the purpose of gift-giving. “節日里的一件禮物或者某些特殊時刻收發的一條短信，這些都不能夠維持一段友誼，”齊崢說。“友情需要長期地奉獻出自己的情感與時間。” Friendships cannot be sustained by a single gift on a holiday, or by a text message on some special occasions, said Qi. [Friendships] require long-term devotion of both emotion and time. 派對也是同樣的道理：每年一兩次的朋友聚會不能確保密友們不會彼此疏遠。19歲的人大學生陳銀澤已婉拒了兩個來自同學的派對邀請，其中的一個是通宵K歌派對。在他眼中，聚會只會提醒他一個事實，那就是他與一些朋友開始有了距離，變得生疏起來。 The same goes for parties: Gathering with friends once or twice a year can't ensure that close friends don't drift apart. Chen Yinze, a 19-year-old at Renmin University, has turned down two party invitations from his classmates, one being an overnight karaoke bash. In his eyes, the party would have only reminded him of how far he has drifted from some of his friends. “每次我和同學一起參加聚會或活動，我都感到沒什么好說的，而且我永遠都是那個不合群的人，”陳銀澤說。 Every time I go to a party or an event with classmates, I feel like I have nothing to say and am always the one being left out, said Chen. 他堅稱自己并不內向自閉，也絕非目中無人。他將這種距離感歸咎于同學之間缺乏接觸及共同愛好。“老實說，在我們班，有些人我很久都沒和他們說過話。” He insists he's not introverted or arrogant, and attributes this distance to limited contact with classmates and a lack of shared interests. To be honest, there're some [people] in my class I haven't talked with for a really long time. 尋找真情 Where's the love? 在節日期間，情侶們也發現彼此的關系步履維艱。 Even couples, it seems, can find themselves on rocky ground during the holiday season. 在過去兩年中，來自華東科技大學經濟學專業，20歲的梁宇就常常在圣誕前夕同女友大動干戈。 For the last two years, Liang Yu, a 20-year-old economics major at East China University of Science and Technology, has had big fights with his girlfriend on Christmas Eve. “買稱心的禮物，說對心的話，甚至要點合胃口的菜——這些任務令我難以招架，”梁宇說。“最糟糕的是不可能將所有事情都做得恰到好處，以滿足我女朋友對一個完美、浪漫圣誕的期許。” Buying the right gift, saying the right words, even ordering the right dishes – these responsibilities can exhaust me, said Liang. The worst thing is that it's impossible to do everything right and meet my girlfriend's expectations for a perfect, romantic Christmas. 然而，許多妙齡女士會辯解說，從某種程度上看，追求別致假日這個“無理要求”也表明對方是否真的在乎自己。 Many young ladies, however, would argue that their unreasonable requirements for a fancy holiday to some extent reflect the quality of their relationship. 四川大學大一新生，18歲的左淑儀稱這些節日是“男孩們含蓄示愛的最好時機”。 Zuo Shuyi, an 18-year-old freshman at Sichuan University, calls the holiday season the right time for boys to show their love in a more symbolic way. 同時，齊崢也建議情侶們努力加深相互間的了解。 Qi, meanwhile, suggests that couples try to be more understanding of each other. “情侶們不要刻意追求電視劇或電影中出現的完美場景，”齊崢說。“如果兩個人平時就能夠細心經營彼此的感情，那么每天都將是圣誕節或情人節。” Couples should not push too hard for the idealistic scenes often shown in TV shows and movies, said Qi. If the two shepherd the relationship well on a daily basis, every day will be like Christmas and Valentine's Day.

Tag: 補習